“When we label guys – single, single-looking, attached, complicated – we forget to look past the label and just see what’s on the outside. So sometimes, some labels are best left in the closet.”
All guys laugh when feeling jovial, frown first before crying and grab a bite when tummy calls. They basically do everything a normal human does. But why is it that everytime they smile gently with their subtle dimples or haughtily bare their just-got-out-of-the-gym bodies or show their gentlemanly ways, we seem to surrender all our white flags. I couldn’t help but wonder “What is it with guys we’re getting ga-ga over with?”
Let’s admit it. Society classify men as to what car model he drives, cellphone unit he holds and the kind of books he reads (if he even reads!). They’re even labelled as to the clique they hang out with. True. Because friends share the same hobbies. Some dance, others solve math problems. But as for us, we judge. And we judge big time.
Enter Exhibit A.
The Good Kind 
Imagine you are in a very long line of your favourite fast food chain waiting for your order to be taken. Then unexpectedly a guy in front of you offers to get your order instead so he can combine it with his. You suddenly wanted to scream “How sweet!” Why? Because even if it’s just a one order away, yet still, there’s the act of kindness amounting to sweetness that we feel oh-so-girly about ourselves. We feel important because we don’t get to experience this kind of treatment very often, at least not in our everyday fastfood-line lives.
I call these guys the “Good Kind”. They are those who offer their seats in the MRT, open and close their car doors for us and, take care of us when we’re sick. Everything they do is for our own benefit. Your activities together include going to church every Sundays, shopping gifts for your nieces and attending your barkada’s birthday parties. Everything’s going so smoothly. You compare your relationship to a plain grass field of a feel-good musical.
Warning!
A calm water runs deep or the other way around. The first 5 months into the relationship may be heaven but after a long time of your boy’s kindness to strangers, you feel like throwing up already. Everything may be running straight according to plan but once you passed by a rough road and slipped through a slope, you may never be able to continue the journey. Besides a girl needs to have a little bit of adventure, right?!
Exhibit B - D’ Intimidator. 
It’s the first day of your new job and you’re getting ready for a mancom meeting. It was getting a bit boring when suddenly the company’s VP for Operations spoke to the front and discussed your monthly’s data revenue. He’s everything you look up to. He’s got the money (or the car!), the brains (speaks at least 3 languages, 1 of them you can’t understand) and the physique (from an exclusive gym membership) that’s exactly from your dreams (wet or not).
D’ Intimidators can be defined directly from its context. They intimidate the hell out of you, in a good way though. He can be your authoritative boss at work or your well-respected college professor. You feel like you just won a beauty pageant wearing a tiara and carrying a hot trophy whenever you’re with your boy. Your girl (and gay) friends are greening with envy since you just scored dating the hunky varsity player of your school or the charming endorser of the latest toothpaste commercial.
Warning!
You may be on cloud nine being an instant celebrity grabbing the perfect catch. However there’s a fine line between getting intimidated and feeling insecure, especially if both these feelings are brought by your man. Jealous girls (and girls at heart!) gaze at your boy with lustful eyes while they stare at you with question mark on their faces everytime you’re together. You’re hearing whispers and you become delusional. I’m hearing “Why care?” but let’s be realistic, it’s hard not to. Question is - can you handle it forever?
Exhibit C.
Geek God 
You and your girlfriends planned on watching the latest horror movie one uneventful weeknight. And as predicted, they all cancelled saying all the lame excuses. As much as you like, you rather not watch it alone since you know you’re a scaredy-cat. You’re starting to lose hope when all of a sudden you heard a knock on your door. It’s your guy-friend-cute-next-door-neighbor asking if he can chill out. A light bulb came across your face and you smiled and Voila! problem solved.
You don’t get to think of him a lot. He’s never included on your list of “5 guys I want to be trapped with in an elevator”. He’s comfortable, harmless and always unexpectedly there. He helps you with your book report, fixes your laptop, advises you the latest in music, etc. They’re called the “Geek God” though not all of them are nerds. You call him ‘tol (dude, bro’, ‘pre) and enjoy each other’s company. You can be in your maximum self when you’re with him. And so is he. You can fart, show your talent and laugh your heart out.
Warning!
Before you call “Love” for your childhood best friend aka Geek God, you have to show him first that your feelings are real and he’s not just a throw-back for someone else. You say this might be destiny since let’s admit it, you know him for a very long time. However, some girls (and I have to reiterate – girls alike!) crave for a little mystery with their man. You need to carefully decide if you’re willing to sacrifice friendship for relationship or the other way around before plunging into the relationship. You find him cute and it might be better if it stays that way.
Last Exhibit.
Man in the Iron Mask (MIM). 
TGISN (Thank God It’s Saturday Night) and every one of your friends are going out – on a date. Of course, you don’t want to be left out a loser. But first, you have to make proper preparations. So before you take a shower or even pick your fabulous getup for the night, you went online first. Cross-fingers and high hopes, you started chatting with the hottest on-looker on the netroom. After about 15 minutes of getting to know each other’s basic info (aka ASL, STATS, PREF), you both agreed to meet up (aka EB). And on your way to the meeting place, a smile is developing on your face thinking you might’ve gotten the perfect catch for the night.
If guys have fantasies, so have we. MIM’s can be those in (tight) uniforms saving us from our damsel in distress’ situations (enter Superman!). Or that rock band vocalist asking you over a crowd full of screaming girls to go up the stage and jam with him. Whatever it is that you fantasize about, one thing’s for sure, us girls (again, girls-alike!) fancy the feeling of mystery. Why do you think girls love to go to bars even if they don’t drink? So an MIM (stranger) can unlimitlessly flirt with her (and she to him). And even for that brief moment, we feel utterly and excitingly desirable. Pathetic but true.
Warning!
Let’s be honest. Out of 10 MIM’s hook-ups, only 3 become successful relationships. Meaning, there is hope. But never dare make false expectations. I have a friend who’s hobby is to date MIM’s and feels he found the One, everytime! Until, his One turned out to be a Crazy One. He went on and on looking for his next MIM who turned out to be crazier than the previous. What I mean is, an MIM can only be probably as good as it’s mask. There’s a lot of kind strangers out there. Same with the not-so. Be careful not to turn your EB’s and ASL’s into RIP. Just a friendly reminder.
I, therefore, conclude that,
Labelling guys differ, from one girl (or gay) to another. It doesn’t matter what we look for or how we see them through. Some desperately search for physicality, others want emotion-understanding ek-ek. A few stick to one label while most hop from one to another. Again it doesn’t matter. It’s your own choice anyway.
But we have to remember one thing - it's not inportant getting ga-ga (committing with or with no-sex) to a guy because of its label. For what its worth, it's falling for him even passed through the label.
